


Hail Harry, Full of Grace

by homosociallyyours



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Catholicism, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Genderswap, Girl Direction, High School, Pining, Religious Content, Songfic, Sort Of, Summer Camp, almost forgot the most basic tag omg, girl almighty, set in the US, they're both 18 here tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-29 22:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21417691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homosociallyyours/pseuds/homosociallyyours
Summary: Louis never thought she'd end up at a religious retreat over a long weekend, but then she never expected to fall for a girl who's really super Catholic, either. The theme of the retreat is love, so maybe it'll come together in the end? There's nothing she wouldn't do for Harry regardless.or: Harry loves God and Louis loves Harry. And they still figure things out.Inspired by Girl Almighty
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 16
Kudos: 77
Collections: FOUR





	Hail Harry, Full of Grace

**Author's Note:**

> I did not expect to be writing anything for Four fest, but when I got word that a pinch hitter was needed for Girl Almighty it felt like fate. 
> 
> It's one of my favorite 1D songs (it was my birthday song this past year instead of Happy Birthday) but I wasn't sure where to go with it until I was lying in bed thinking about what would make you go down on your knees for someone. Being raised Catholic, this is what happened. 
> 
> Many thanks to my beta, statementlou, for helping me rev up my inspiration and also for getting me to settle on this particular fic when I had three versions of the story started (and might still write at least one of them). Also thanks to lululawrence/Sus for asking if I might wanna write this AND to dinosaursmate/KK for putting this fest together!!
> 
> (Also I am not certain I tagged everything I needed to, so if you spot something I missed please lmk!)

Harry is everything Louis wants in a girlfriend: she’s smart, funny, playful, kind, and she gives really amazing hugs. The kind that feel like coming home. When she smiles it’s like Louis can feel herself lifting up into the air, floating on a cloud of good vibes. The only problem-- and it’s not necessarily a problem, really, but it at least feels like one when Louis really lets herself dwell on it --is that Harry is very, very Catholic. As in, goes to mass every Sunday, crosses herself when an ambulance passes, prays before eating, actually believes she’s eating the body of Christ _ Catholic _. 

It’s fine. It is! Because Harry is gay, too. Or. She’s not straight, anyway. Whenever the subject comes up, Harry gets a funny look on her face, lips drawing tight and a crease forming where her eyebrows draw together, and says something like, “I just don’t think we should have to label ourselves,” before moving onto a different topic. But she’s the Vice-President of the Rainbow Coalition (the LGBTQ+ club that she and Louis both petitioned for last year) and she keeps a little rainbow flag pin on her backpack AND she once confessed that if she had to pick any character from the MCU to kiss it would probably be Valkyrie. 

Louis almost fell off her chair when that happened. She managed to keep her cool, though, and just say, “me too” instead of “God I wish I were Valkyrie,” but it was a very near thing. 

So that’s how Louis ended up here, sitting on a log in the middle of the woods at twilight and holding a candle in her hand as the retreat director leads them in their first prayer service of the long weekend. 

“During the time we have together this week, we’re going to talk a lot about learning to love ourselves, love others, and finally and most importantly to love and glorify God in all that we do. As we gather together, we ask the Holy Spirit to help ignite the fires of justice in our hearts, that we may turn our selfishness into compassion and our worries to action. For it is in love that all things become possible.” Louis watched the wax that dripped down her candle pool on the paper ring around it as the director paused for a moment. “In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.” 

Louis crossed herself hurriedly as the retreat director stood. 

“You have fifteen minutes before dinner in the main hall. Most of you have already put your things in your assigned cabins, but for those who haven’t, Liam can help you.” The director nodded toward a guy with brown hair and a way too friendly smile on his face. “After dinner we _ are _ having ice breaker activities, and they are definitely mandatory, so stick around after you finish eating, ‘kay?” 

Louis blew out her candle and finally looked up to see Harry across from her, smiling as usual and fiddling with the hem of her denim shorts as she looked away from the director and straight at Louis, who quickly pulled a face as if that was the reason she’d been looking in Harry’s direction. In truth her eyes just always found Harry in a room (or around a circle, in this case); it wasn’t something she even did consciously so much as a habit that she didn’t care to let go of. 

“Lou!” Harry darted through the scattering crowd and threw her arms around Louis, squeezing her tight as she always did and talking quietly in Louis’ ear instead of leaning back to address her properly. “Was so worried when you weren’t here. You’re in my cabin; I saved you the top bunk next to mine.” 

Louis smiled into Harry’s shoulder. “Thanks, babe. You’re the best best.” She still had her arms wrapped around Harry’s waist, wondering if their hug had gone on too long or not. She pulled back just in case. “We had to pick the twins up before we could head out here, and ended up stuck in traffic. Didn’t think it was worth trying to text since there’s likely not much service out here.” 

“Yeah, that’s smart. There’s a little service just past the showers, but it’s not much.” Harry shoved her hands in her pockets and turned, seeming to notice that she and Louis were the last ones standing in the prayer service clearing or whatever this place was called. Louis tipped her chin toward the main hall. 

“We should go, yeah? I wanna throw my bag on that bunk so nobody else tries to take it.” 

Harry nodded and led the way down the path. “The cabins are nice here. It’s your first time, right? Doing a retreat like this?” 

“Yeah, I was never really much for it at my old school, and so I’ve never done one here.” Harry turned to give Louis a curious look, opening her mouth as if she was about to ask what changed. Louis rushed to speak. “You just made it sound really fun, though, so I thought I might as well give it a go.” 

“I’m really glad you did.” Harry’s face softened into a smile. “Hopefully it won’t be a disappointment.” 

“Nothing could disappoint me with you around.” Louis linked her arm in Harry’s as they ambled down the wood chip path. 

It wasn’t long before they reached the cabins, Harry heading inside while Louis ran over to the main hall entrance and picked up her backpack and sleeping bag and pillow, feeling a bit like a kid as she made her way back to the cabin door. She kicked at it lightly a couple of times, peeking in and waiting for Harry to see her. She didn’t have to wait long; Harry had chosen beds right by the door and was leaning against the frame of the bunks staring at the cabin door. She hurried over to open it for Louis. 

“Our cabin’s not even full,” she said in a half-whisper, waggling her eyebrows as if that information would be meaningful to Louis. When Louis didn’t respond, Harry rolled her eyes and leaned closer. “There’s only one chaperone since we’re not full, so if we feel like sneaking out it’ll be easy.” She took a seat on the bottom bunk, resting her weight on her elbows. “Also we can pick top or bottom, it doesn’t really matter.” 

“We can both be tops, that’s fine,” Louis said, turning away quickly. Harry being openly defiant of rules was a turn-on for her, apparently, and she couldn’t handle seeing Harry’s devious smile or the way her t-shirt pulled across her shoulders when she sat like she was. Harry’s barking laugh made her turn back to look though. 

“Both be tops,” Harry said through a cascade of giggles. “Was that on purpose?” 

Louis raised her hand to her chest and gasped, trying to look offended. “How dare you insinuate that I would say something perverse at a _ religious retreat _ for _ Jesus!” _Sure, she hadn’t actually thought about what she was saying when she was talking about the bunks, but she figured she might as well take the credit anyway. Harry seemed to like it, her giggles intensifying for a moment. 

A loud bell signalled that they should go to the mess hall for dinner, and Louis tossed the rest of her things up onto the bunk beside Harry’s before tugging her up off the bed. “C’mon, we better get going. That retreat lady looked serious.” 

“Oh, Miss Pat is a total softie. She just pretends to be tough. The only time I’ve ever seen her lose it was when she caught a bunch of leaders sneaking wine coolers by the ropes course last year.” Louis’ eyes bugged out of her head. 

“Were _ you _ drinking wine coolers by the ropes course, Harold? The horror!” 

Harry laughed again, slipping her arm through Louis’ and squeezing tight against her. “No! But I was helping with set up and it all happened before the retreat last year, so I followed her down there.” They entered the dining hall together, pushing the doors open in sync and laughing about it as they found their way to a table that wasn’t too crowded. When the last campers straggled in, one of the leaders stood and led everyone in a prayer before Miss Pat explained that they’d go up for dinner table by table until they had their groups assigned. 

“Do we have to eat with our group?” Louis asked, stomach souring at the thought of sitting with a bunch of people she didn’t know who might end up being shitty homophobes. 

“Usually they have you do it for breakfast or lunch, but then not for dinner. But if we end up in the same group together it wouldn’t even matter.” Harry laid her hand over Louis’, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I might’ve asked if we could be in the same group,” she said, leaning against Louis’ side. _"Maybe_.” 

It wasn’t that intimate, but it was so lovely that Louis could practically feel herself internally combusting. She quickly reached around Harry’s face and pinched her cheek.“There’s my favorite brilliant girl who lights up my life!” She felt Harry’s cheeks dimple, her skin warming slightly as she blushed. “The best.” It felt like a win. 

They made it through dinner (“Sloppy Josephs” according to Harry) and ice breakers (a horrible game where they were told the toilet paper was limited and they’d need to take as much as they’d need for the rest of the day, only to then be told that they needed to supply a fact about themselves for each square they’d taken, the only upside being that they were not in fact out of toilet paper) before Miss Pat handed out their group assignments. Louis breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that she and Harry both had purple folders, potential homophobic bullets dodged. 

“You have a schedule inside your folder with a list of everything we’ll be doing, but if you’re ever unsure of where to be, just come back here and someone will help you find your way. Breakfast is ready at 8am, and we will _ not _ wait for you, so you’d better be here on time. We have ways of waking you up!” 

A chorus of hoots when around the hall, and Louis turned to Harry with a confused look on her face. Harry responded by sticking her tongue out and closing her eyes so she looked like a half-dead frog. 

“Some of you know what I’m talking about, don’t you? You’ll all be wiser by the end of our time together. For now we’re going to circle up in here and have a little meditative prayer service before sending you back to cabins to wind _ down _, as in no staying up all night talking. Lights out is at 10pm tonight. And now Liam, if you’ll light our candle we’ll welcome the Holy Spirit here with us, for where two or three are gathered in His name, there He will be. Let us bow our heads and pray.” 

Louis bowed her head, already annoyed with having a second prayer service in one night. She glanced to her right, watching Harry slide a finger underneath the frayed hem of her jean shorts, and decided to meditate on that instead of whatever Miss Pat was saying. She thought about covering Harry’s hand with her own. How Harry’s skin would feel under her fingertips, the tickle of frayed fabric and the softness of the downy hair that covered her thighs. Would she want that? Would she giggle? Push Louis’ hand away? Or maybe lay her own hand right on top of it, her smile like morning breaking. 

“...Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.” 

Louis realized belatedly that she’d missed an entire Hail Mary while she focused on Harry. Maybe she’d done a Hail Harry instead? She shook her head, jolting when she felt a hand on her arm. Of course it was Harry, who (definitely, probably) couldn’t read minds, right? She looked peaceful. 

“Did you get into that? Or did you fall asleep a little?” She poked at Louis’ side. “I didn’t hear you say the prayer at the end, I know that sometimes happens to me when I get really into the guided meditation.” 

“The-- yeah, I was kinda meditating I guess. On my own a bit.” Louis shrugged, looking around the room for some kind of out. 

“Wanna go get ready for bed? The bathroom lines are awful at night but they’re worse in the morning.” Harry stood, offering Louis a hand up that she accepted with a smile but didn’t actually need or use. 

“Yeah, we’ll get ready for bed and then,” Louis looked around as they left the main hall, “figure out our plans.” 

“I’ve got us covered Lou, don’t worry. Been to this camp for the past six years, so I know all the best spots.” Harry threw an arm around Louis’ shoulder, resting her head against Louis’. “You’ll see.” 

It took a few hours, but by 11:30 it seemed like everyone in their cabin was asleep and the coast was clear for them to sneak out. The only big light was over the main hall; everything else that surrounded the cabins laid in relative darkness, only illuminated by moonlight. Harry grabbed her flashlight and a blanket before they left their bunks and then led Louis down a path that went behind a couple of cabins before veering away from any of the directions they’d gone previously. Louis clutched Harry’s hand tightly, eyes down to watch for anything that might trip them up. She needn’t have worried, though. After a few more minutes of walking a relatively clear path, they ended up coming to a clearing that led down to a small man-made lake.

“We’re here,” Harry whispered. She took Louis’ hand properly and led her to tiny dock. “Should be far enough away that nobody will hear us, but we should talk quietly anyway, just in case.” 

“Right, yeah,” Louis said, grateful for the warning. She could be loud sometimes without thinking about it. Harry spread the blanket out on the old wooden dock, tapping beside her when Louis hesitated for a moment. “Brought this for the splinters? Genius, as usual.” 

“Oh yeah. They’re awful. Learned that the hard way.” In the moonlight Harry’s smile was somehow even lovelier. 

The two of them took their shoes off and dangled their toes in the water. It had been a warm day, but the night was a little chilly, and whenever Louis dipped more than just a toe in her whole body would shiver. She wiggled closer to Harry. 

“So. Retreats. When did you start? Why did you start? Tell me everything.” 

Harry stifled a laugh. “_ That’s _ what you wanna ask me about? Okay, let’s see. I started the first year I could, so, when I was twelve. And, I dunno, they always seemed cool? The priest always has everyone pray ‘for the youth on retreat, that they may become closer to the Lord,’ and that sounded really important, I guess. Then I just liked it. My parents can’t afford a real sleep away camp, so this is a decent substitute. And you do all sorts of like, personality tests? To help you be a better leader or get closer with God. It’s alright.” 

She tucked her foot under one leg and kicked the other out to skim the water. “Also thought I wanted to be a nun before I realized I was--” she shrugged, turning away from Louis, “--you know.” 

“A nun?” Louis said, voice lifting a bit louder than she intended. She quickly corrected her volume before Harry could. “Did you really?”

“Don’t tease!” 

“I’m not! I’m asking, really.” Louis brushed her hand over the soft cotton of Harry’s pajama pants. “_ Really. _”

“It was only for a couple of years. Everyone else was always talking about boys and who they wanted to date, and mass was the worst for it. People would pass notes and joke around, and I hated it. Felt like I liked mass more than boys, so I thought maybe I should be a nun.” Harry paused, shivering, and scooted a little closer to Louis. “Didn’t really tell anyone about it but a priest in confession. He just told me to pray on it and that God would give me an answer.” 

“Did He?” Louis slipped her arm through Harry’s to share warmth. 

“Yeah, got a crush on a girl. Tale as old as time.” Harry chuckled to herself. “Anyway, I still think about it sometimes, not to do it but like, how a lot of girls must’ve done that when they felt like I did.” 

“Just like, become a nun because you don’t want a boyfriend?”

“A bit like that, yeah,” Harry said, resting her head against Louis’. They hadn’t talked like this before, really, with this kind of quiet openness, and Louis was relishing every second. It felt like they were in a soap bubble together, floating out over the lake in a delicate little world that could disappear at any moment. Louis definitely didn’t want it to. 

“I saw a book about lesbian nuns once,” she said softly. “Didn’t pick it up, but it’s out there. I think that was the title, even. Lesbian Nuns.” 

“Yeah, I’ve seen it I think. I’m glad I don’t want that anymore. But it’s still complicated, I guess.” 

“The religious thing?” Over the course of their conversation, they’d begun holding hands, and Louis smoothed her thumb over the back of Harry’s hand.

“Yeah, like the Church isn’t really gay friendly, y’know? But a lot of the individuals are, so it still feels alright. And mass is always going to be nice to me. How it’s always the same everywhere and has been for so long.” 

Louis hummed in response, not really sure what to say. 

“You don’t feel that way, do you?” Louis could feel Harry’s breath against her cheek where she’d turned her head slightly to ask the question, and she only just stopped herself from turning toward Harry as well. 

“Not really, no. My family wants me to go to church, so I go to church. Mostly I zone out, think about what else I’d rather be doing or something like that. I don’t mind the singing part. Went to a couple of youth choir practices when I was thirteen or so; anyone who wanted to play guitar could and I thought it might be a decent way to learn.” Louis laughed to herself at the memory of showing up and trying to learn guitar from the choir director’s surly nineteen year old son. “It was _ not _ a decent way to learn.” 

Harry shook her head, her flyaway hairs tickling Louis’ ear. “Totally not. You play now though, right?” 

“Yeah, yeah. Learned off youtube.” Louis squeezed Harry a little tighter, feeling goosebumps rising on both their arms. “Much better teacher.” 

They sat in silence for a moment, Louis rubbing her hand over Harry’s arm to try to warm her up. 

“Forgot how cold it gets,” Harry said, leaning into Louis’ touch. “Should’ve brought a hoodie.” 

Louis wondered if that was Harry’s way of saying she was cold and wanted to leave. She didn’t want that, though, and so she couldn’t bring herself to ask if that was what Harry was hoping for. She’d consider staying out in the cool dark night til it turned to morning if Harry would let her. 

“You didn’t say why you came though,” Harry said after a bit more silence. “On the retreat, I mean. What made this one different?” 

For a moment Louis debated lying, maybe saying that her mother had insisted. She also thought about stretching the truth by pretending that she’d come because Harry was her friend and had asked her to-- not totally false, but sidestepping what mattered. And she knew that no matter what her answer was, Harry would accept it at face value. 

“You,” she said finally. Harry didn’t respond or react, but she stayed put, so Louis continued. “I never would’ve come if you hadn’t asked. We haven’t known each other that long, but I guess there’s not a lot I wouldn’t do for you.” 

A sharp crack in the distance pulled them out of the moment, both of them turning simultaneously toward the sound so fast that they barely missed bumping heads. Harry gasped, her mouth flying toward Louis’ ear to whisper, “I think I saw a flashlight. Get up and follow me. Stay close.” 

She was up in a flash, Louis grabbing the blanket and following behind her, treading as quietly as possible. Harry led the way without the help of a flashlight, stopping when she came to a fat tree stump. She held a finger to her lips and pointed in the distance, where Louis could see a flashlight beam shining against the back of the cabins. It had all seemed much farther away when she walked with Harry, and so she was surprised to realize just how close it really was. 

The person with the flashlight walked back up toward the main hall, their footsteps gradually fading into the quiet. Louis breathed a sigh of relief, leaning against a tree while Harry sat on the stump. 

“Don’t think they heard us, do you?” Louis asked. Already she missed the closeness she’d had on the dock with Harry, and she wished there was a way to get it back. 

Harry shook her head. “No, think it was just rounds. Probably Liam, it’s his first year so he won’t know the paths that well.” Harry sat down on the tree stump facing Louis. She stared for a while without saying anything, the shadows from the moonlight through the trees keeping Louis from reading her face.

“Lou,” she said finally. “What did you mean there’s not much you wouldn’t do for me?” 

Louis looked back at her and decided to go for it. If worse came to worse she could pretend to be joking or say it wasn’t anything or call her mother to come pick her up before any of the group activities started. 

“I meant that if you asked me to go to church, I would. If you wanted me to follow you into something deep and unknown, I’d do it. You could ask me for anything and I’d wanna at least try to give it to you.” Louis took a breath and turned her eyes up to the sky for a moment. The moon was on its way to full, and she could see the craters of its full face even where it wasn’t illuminated. Then she looked at Harry and felt like she was brighter than that. Like she was the whole thing. Louis took a few steps until she was standing in front of the stump that Harry still sat on, staring back at her. 

“I don’t particularly care that much about Jesus or God or the church or retreats, but I care about you.” Louis sunk to her knees slowly; she might have lost her balance if Harry hadn’t reached out a hand to steady her. “I don’t pray very much but I would do it for you. I know it’s a lot, it’s too much, it’s--” 

“It’s amazing,” Harry said. From her place on the stump she was a bit taller than Louis was kneeling, and she leaned down, taking Louis’ face in her hands. “It’s everything I didn’t believe anyone would say to me. That you’d say.” 

“Me?” Louis braced herself against Harry’s open thighs. “You want me?” 

“Yes, of course, always.” Harry nodded, tipping her head toward Louis’ as Louis surged to meet her. Their noses bumped awkwardly as they slowly decided on an angle together, neither one of them particularly experienced enough with kissing to proceed without care. When their lips met, Louis was shocked at the electricity of it. It was soft, gentle even, but charged. She and Harry opened their mouths together, trying for more but unsure exactly how to get there. 

When Harry’s tongue met hers, Louis gasped, shocked at the sensation of it. She wasn’t entirely sure what to do with it, so she clung a little tighter to Harry and focused on the soft, wet warmth of Harry’s tongue against her own, Harry’s slightly chapped lips brushing hers. It might not have been perfect, but to Louis it was heaven. 

Louis shifted slightly, trying to get closer to Harry from her kneeling position. For just a moment, she thought that this must be what it’s like to take communion if you really believe in it-- to kneel down and open your mouth to receive another’s body, full of need and desire for it. And maybe that was sacrilege or blasphemy or some other kind of sin, but Louis couldn’t find it in herself to care. Not when she was kissing Harry. _ Harry. _

They pulled apart after a moment with a wet sound that made Louis shiver as she gasped for air. She wanted to kiss Harry again already, and it hadn’t even been more than a few seconds. She’d never doubted that she was truly gone for Harry, but this was even more proof. 

“I want to do only that now, please,” Harry said, her hand on Louis’ cheek. She was breathing hard too, and even in the moonlight her eyes were filled with desire. Looking at her made Louis feel drunk, and realizing that she’d just said exactly what Louis had been thinking was enough to make her whine, anxious to have her mouth on Harry’s again. 

“We can, if I have anything to say about it.” 

They definitely stayed out too late kissing. Eventually both of them had gotten too cold for even their shared warmth to make it possible to stay outside, especially with a cool breeze coming off the lake. Louis’ knees cracked when she finally stood, and as she brushed the dirt and twigs from them she wondered if she’d have some kind of permanent mark from kneeling for so long. Then Harry dropped to her knees and that was all Louis cared about. 

“Your knees, Lou! Were you kneeling on a rock or something?” Harry switched her flashlight on to inspect Louis’ knees carefully. It looked like she had been kneeling on a rock, maybe, as there was a pinprick of blood inside of a small indentation just below her kneecap. Harry leaned in and kissed Louis’ knee, laying her head against Louis’ leg and looking up at her. “Why didn’t we move? Can’t believe you’re hurt because of me.” 

Louis rested her hand on Harry’s head, letting her fingers tangle in her hair. “Wasn’t because of you. I swear I didn’t feel it till I stood up. I’ll get down on my knees for you anytime, rocks or not.” The way Harry looked back up at her made Louis regret having to go back to their cabin. It was almost enough to make her ask to stay out and keep kissing, but then Harry shivered and Louis was hauling her back up and pulling her close instead. 

“We’ve gotta go back. It’s past 2 now, and you’re about to freeze.” Louis put the blanket over both their shoulders before they started back to their cabin. Harry led them on a different path, this one taking them by the bathrooms so they had a plausible excuse for being out so late if someone caught them coming back in. 

They both had to pee, so they really did have a stop at the bathroom. Louis stared at herself in the mirror, the too bright fluorescent lights highlighting her disheveled hair and kiss swollen lips. When Harry came out, she went to use Louis’ sink, bumping her hip into Louis’ and smiling at her shyly. She looked angelic even in the harsh light, and Louis wondered for a second if it was warm enough here to keep kissing. 

“Oh, oops.” Harry was looking in the mirror and giggling, her head turned to expose a hickey on her neck. Louis blushed. 

“Shit. I’m sorry, I wasn’t even thinking about it when--” 

“It’s okay. I like it.” Harry stroked her finger over the love bite. “I want a whole collection of them, even.” She turned, eyeing Louis playfully. “Might need to give you one too, though. Just to balance things out a bit.” 

Louis’ eyes widened as she backed away, her heart racing at the thought of another makeout session with Harry. She reached out and tugged Harry toward her, walking them backwards until she was against the wall, Harry pressed against her. “Go ahead,” she said, baring her neck. “Do your worst.” 

“Or my best,” Harry whispered against her skin, kissing down from just below Louis’ ear to the juncture of her neck and shoulder. When she reached her desired spot, she kissed it softly once and then twice before sucking a mark to spot while Louis held her close, squirming in her arms. When she pulled away, Louis brought her right back to kiss her properly. They’d both earned it. 

Louis wasn’t sure how she’d slept at all that night. When she and Harry got back to the cabin, they’d crawled into their sleeping bags and reached out a hand to one another, knowing they had to be quiet. Louis wasn’t sure who fell asleep first, but when she woke up it was to the sound of one of the other girls in the cabin teasing them for holding hands through the night. 

At breakfast, they walked in together, Louis’ arm around Harry’s waist. Out of the corner of her eye, Louis thought she saw Miss Pat give Harry a little thumbs up as they walked by; apparently she was both a softie and a friend to gay kids. When they’d gotten their food and sat down with the rest of their group, one of their leaders grabbed their attention. 

“Groups pray individually for breakfast, but I thought for this first day we’d ease into it.” He smiled, nodding as if agreeing with himself. “Now I know some of you might not pray all the time, and it can be weird to just dive in, so I thought today we’d do things a little different. Instead of prayers, each of you is going to propose a toast. Try to say something you’re thankful for, mention someone or something you appreciate. I’ll go first.” He raised his cup of orange juice. “To new beginnings with new people. I can’t wait to get to know all of you.” 

They each went around, people toasting everything from the crispy bacon to the fact that they weren’t limited on toilet paper use as they were told the night before. When it was Louis’ turn, she looked at Harry and raised her cup. “To finding someone warm and generous and caring to love and who loves you too.” Immediately after saying it she felt like it was too much. But then Harry squeezed her leg gently and Louis looked to see her smiling. 

“To people who make you feel like you’re really special,” Harry said, lifting her cup. She was the last person at the table to speak, and so the group leader raised his cup again. 

“We’ll all have our cups meet in the middle now, and we’ll look up and acknowledge each other, right?” He leaned forward, and everyone copied him, cups poised to touch together at his word. “To all these things and things we care for that are unspoken, we offer praise. Cheers.” 

Cups met and orange juice splashed, everyone laughing and nodding to one another. When Louis met Harry’s eyes, she could feel her own smile brighten. She leaned close to whisper, “I’m gonna toast you every day. You’ll get sick of it.” 

“I’d never,” Harry replied, shaking her head. She gave Louis a peck on the cheek. 

Toasts or prayers, Louis wasn’t lying, and she felt like Harry wasn’t either. She’d spend the rest of her life making this girl feel like the most special person in the room (because she was) and she hoped Harry would never, ever tire of it. (And she wouldn’t). 

**Author's Note:**

> Fic post [here](https://homosociallyyours.tumblr.com/post/189198952649/homosociallyyours-hail-harry-full-of-gracea) on tumblr! all of the fics in this fest are going to be awesome so please check out [the whole collection](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/FOURficfest/works)! 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


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